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The Brioche Breeze 1​.​4 - July​/​August 2022

by Noah Church

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1.
Fuck it’s cold this morning. Too late to see the sun rise. Fog rolls through the street, thick. Fuck, you almost found me. I just gave myself up. I am learning how to lose. But I don’t want to lose you. When I come back through give something I can cling to. Maybe I am doomed. So, punch me in the mouth. Fuck me, I’m surviving. I was dying earlier now I’m crying. Now I’m driving behind the sunset. Fuck, you almost had me. Fell out of a bad dream. I am forgetting what it’s like. Was it ever right? When I come back home give me someone to take it out on. Put me on my throne and punch me in the mouth. Punch me in the mouth. Punch me in the mouth. I want the burning. I want the flames. I want to know if the ocean really knows my name.
2.
Undying 03:36
Just enough. Just in time. Just asking. No problem. No worries. No one can tell. I fell through a crack in the footpath. It felt like I was undying. I’m trying. I’m hiding under that rock. I’m asking. I’m leaving under a bright star. I landed at the foot of a gateway. A woman as tall as a tree whispered my name. She lifted me up so I could see. Then sent me home. A whisper like lightning. A shoelace untying. I’m coming, I’m trying. It feels like I’m undying.
3.
I don’t know. I am sure. Don’t ask me. Tell me when you leave.
4.
Goodbye gorgeous girl, I am leaving now. I hope you don’t get cold as the sun goes down. There are biscuits in the bowl and I left the tunnel out. Goodbye gorgeous girl, I’ll be back home soon. I hope you don’t miss me as much as I’ll miss you. I hope you think of me when you look up at the moon. When the wind dies down and the sky goes pink, I watch the stars come out and wonder what you think. I wonder where you are you now, I wonder what you’re doing. Goodbye gorgeous girl, I love you so much. When the sun stands on the sea it feels like we almost touch. When I jangle my keys at the door I know you’ll rush.
5.
Did I just see what I think I saw? There was a big black cloud coming for us all. Now it’s slinking over the back fence like a petty thief caught in the backyard. And I was sure we would be soaked. But I think you just (I think you just) willed the rain away. Did anyone ever tell you that when you lose something you can’t get it back? So, hold onto what’s important and let everything else be exported. Like a wave that breaks and returns to sea. And I think you just (I think you just) swam away from me. I think you just swam away from me. But I think you’re headed towards an island. And you’re the only one who can find it. And you might not know what it looks like but you’ll know as soon as you arrive. And I think you just (I think you just) found yourself at home. I think you just found yourself at home. I think you just (I think you just) found yourself at home.
6.
Stretching 02:51
A wind blew. The break of day. I wondered: How will I know? A laughing on the powerlines. A stretching. Pulling like the sea. Bouncing off the roofs of cars. I waited for the street to still. Clinging to branches strong enough. While pools of leaves swirled at my feet. Your face in the sun. I can only do my best. A gliding through the bluest sky. An emptiness, not a secret. The ocean doesn’t overflow. The cracks are wide. The holes are bare. The trees are cold. Their branches – bare. The beaches – bare. The streets are bare. You are bare.
7.
Crackle 04:20
A sky so blue. A sun so bright. I have to shield my eyes. I slept all night. And woke up well. I stepped outside. To a sky so blue. And a sun so bright. Golden on skin. Soft and steady wind. I breathe the morning in. And watch the fading moon. Melting into a sky so blue. A flock of cockatoos. Crashing into a sun so bright. A story told. A moment lost. In front of us. Another one. Another blade of glowing grass. Reaching up to a flock of cockatoos. Crashing into a swimming pool. And I love you. What happens if we don’t? We’ll never know. What happens if we fall? We can’t. What happens if we don’t? We’ll never know. And I love you. And I love you. What happens if the dark swallows all of us? What happens when they call our names? What happens if the night comes back for us? What happens if the sky is so blue? What happens if the sun is so bright? What happens if a flock of cockatoos reaches down and teaches us how to fly?
8.
There is just enough wind in the softening sky. It’s the second last day. It’s the very first time. We are just big enough in a world smaller than— In a morning I found in a white pot plant. Waking up is hard to do, though it’s getting warmer. I’m covered in the morning dew. All along Yule Road there is jasmine in bloom. All throughout the street it floats until it finds you. All along Yule Road there are baby magpies. And their mum swoops my head when I ride past on my bike. I have not done anything wrong and neither have you. But letting go is hard to do. And this is why it haunts you so bad. It reminds you of the things that you had. I wish it didn’t hurt us so bad. Waking up is hard to do. But it’s getting easier.
9.

about

The Brioche Breeze is a bi-monthly publication presenting a selection of highlights from the popular blog of the same name. Curated and edited by Joey Fucking Brioche, TBB 1.4 features songs by Yev Kassem, as well as an exclusive piece from radarbackwards.

Check out the blog here: thebriochebreeze.blogspot.com

credits

released September 3, 2022

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Noah Church Newcastle, Australia

massive idiot

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